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How-to manage a professional nemesis, Hot tips from Sanaa Humayun, emerging artist & established nemesis-haver. *please note that this advice is coming from a Scorpio and should be taken with caution. Also this is satire. While I do love to keep an enemy list I also firmly believe that most things can be resolved through open and honest communication when both parties have good intentions. But then again - as racialized artists sometimes you just need to keep yourself safe, and as emerging artists there’s often a power dynamic held by established white artists who hoard power and wield it unethically. At that point I think it’s actually your responsibility to consider them your nemesis and treat them accordingly. Here’s how I approach it.


1. Put their name on your Enemy List. This is a crucial first step as it is easy to lose track of a new enemy. It’s important to stay organized and on top of your revenge plans in order to avoid burnout. 2. Ruminate on how they have wronged you. This is key in order to understand how to move forward. Were you hate-crimed? Repeatedly micro aggressed? It’s important to establish the level of appropriate revenge. Overreacting would be embarrassing. 3. Consider Modes of Revenge. Potential options include: Farting in the gallery when attending their exhibitions - the closer to the work the better Unfollowing them on social media after they post so they feel bad about the content they put out Yawn repeatedly during their artist talks. Give quizzical looks followed by a shrug A chilling open letter detailing every way they wronged you, posted on your Instagram via a screenshots of your notes app.


4. Subtly undermine their career “Oh I just love their work! It's nice to not have to think too much sometimes” “Their work is so brave” Ask them about their work and when they’re done talking say “aw that's cute - i remember doing something similar during my undergrad”. Hot Tip: begin a devastating critique by saying “Can I say something controversial, yet brave?” to get people primed.


5. Forgive and forget Just kidding lol. Never forgive. Never forget. 6. Treat every opportunity they receive as a personal insult to you. 7. Remember that you’re hotter and smarter than them Probably. It’s a good bet. But Most Importantly, 8. Do better than them Grow communities that break down the barriers that they put up. Take their job and do it better. Spite is a great motivator.